My New Life Without ...

My new life without Andrew by my side.

I've blogged for years about the day to day life of my family but in October last year the unthinkable happened and I lost my husband, my best friend & my security. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to endure but here I am, still in one piece and although I miss him every single day, I'm enjoying all the good things life has to offer.

They say life begins at 40 and OMG it did. I had foreign holidays to places like the Jamaica, Florida & the Maldives. I became a grandma to the most adorable little boy whom I love with all my heart and my 3 wonderful daughters became my best friends.

Next year I'll be 50 so we've organised a big family holiday to Cuba for 10 days. Before that I'm off to America to tour round the Deep South, skiing in France and in 12 months time I'll be in Russia spending 4 nights in St Petersburg & 4 nights in Moscow. Two weekends ago I spent 9 hours stood in the same spot at the Isle of Wight Festival watching Newton Faulkner, the Boomtown Rats, Paloma Faith, The Script & Jon Bon Jovi and yesterday I bought tickets for the Isle of Wight Bestival to see (amongst others), the amazing Elton John!

I'm still part of the camera club and have been doing yoga for 8 weeks. I work in admin and love my job ... most of the time :) My best friend Tracey goes walking with me and so far we've been to the Ballet, The Ideal Home Show, the Reduced Shakespeare Company, an Hawaiian evening at Bluebells and to see the photographer Tim Allen. We've got tonnes lined up too, Riverdance, Cirque de Soliel, East Coast Boys to name but a few so although my life has changed considerably, it's not all bad.

Tomorrow would have been mine & Andrew's 29th wedding anniversary and I feel sad that Andrew won't be here to Share it with me. I'm sure we would have been married for twice as long as that had he still been here. I'm sad that he will miss out on such a lot, but I couldn't wish him back to suffer because I know he was doing. I'll try my best to live life for the both of us and I know in my heart, he isn't very far away. Love you Andy Pandy x